The first stage we go through when trying to understand the purpose of creation is working on ourselves for personal gain (“not for His name”) since there are many ways to feel pleasure—eating, playing games, receiving honors and glory, etc. These methods, however, allow us to feel only small and fleeting pleasures. The motivations behind such actions are “for the self.”
Life is considered to be a state in which we perceive desires for attaining pleasure, either from receiving or from giving. If the desire to attain pleasure disappears, then the new state is that of unconsciousness, fainting, or death. If we are in such a state that we clearly see and feel that we cannot receive any more pleasure, for example because of the shame that we feel for past actions.
If we suffer so much that even the smallest pleasure we get out of life is neutralized, then we will no longer feel like living. Thus, by means of the surrounding environment, enemies, bankruptcy, or failure in one’s work, those who are ascending spiritually may experience sensations of hopelessness, despair, and a complete lack of meaning of existence.
In the spiritual world, all laws and desires are diametrically opposite to those of our world.
Just as in our world, it is extremely difficult to act contrary to knowledge and understanding, so in the spiritual world it is extremely difficult to progress with knowledge.
An individual receives pleasure from three types of sensations: past, present, and future. The greatest pleasure is derived from the sensations of the future, because an individual begins to anticipate the pleasure in the present, that is, the pleasure is experienced in the present. In this way, anticipating and thinking about objectionable deeds are worse than the deeds themselves, because the anticipation prolongs the pleasure and occupies the thoughts of the individual for a long time.
There are two kinds of Light of the Creator: the Light of knowledge, reason, and wisdom (called Ohr Hochma), and the Light of mercy, confidence, and unity (called Ohr Hassadim). In turn, Ohr Hochma comes in two types according to its action upon us.
At first, when the Light arrives, we discover our own evil. Then, when we have discovered the evil, and realize that we should not use egoism, this same Light imparts strength towards those egoistic wishes, so that we can work (take pleasure) with them, but not for our own sake. Finally, when we gain the strength to overcome our own egoism, this same Light makes it possible for the corrected, formerly egoistic desires to take pleasure in altruism.
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